Toasting (the end of) 2013

I hate to say it because it saw the arrival of my adorable boy, but 2013 was quite disappointing and very difficult. Between leaving the UK (tears), struggling to settle down in Malta (more tears), the battle with the Maltese gynae system (so many tears), learning to cope with two kids (tears), facing up to the fact that we are still struggling to settle down and not completely happy here (you know it... more tears), it's been a somewhat emotional year.

However, there have also been positives. A fantastic summer, relationships with my little brother and sisters have absolutely blossomed, I've gotten to know David's parents better, our parents have gotten to know the children, I've come to respect myself as a mother in the face of a lot of adversity, David and I have been reminded how to have fun together, and what our priorities are. All precious positives that will stay with me for a long time to come.

Some pictures of the best moments of 2013, because this is the way I'd rather remember it:

Emily's 2nd Birthday

Revisiting old childhood places

Adam's birth, and the beautiful moment when Emily met her brother

Family time

Fantastic summer moments

Visits from best friends in the UK

and cousins

and more great friends!

Emily starting school and meeting her first proper best friend

Watching these two bond

Getting to know this little monkey

Time away with my best friend

 Adam's first Christmas

And Emily's first Christmas that she truly understood. Magical. 

2014 doesn't promise to be a quiet one either, but hopefully it'll be a better, happier one. 

Happy New Year dear reader.

Remembering Me

I never got round to writing a post welcoming 2013. Not that it needed welcoming - it was going to happen whether we wanted it to or not, whether those Mayans thought it would or not. And I don't really do resolutions because as we all know they very rarely last a week. It just doesn't seem worth the effort of thinking them up.

But if there is something I want to do in 2013, it's remember Me. Last year, I pushed myself aside. I forgot about me, things got so busy sometimes even having a shower felt like a waste of time. When I did have some spare time I was mostly so pooped I could barely scrape myself up off the sofa to do anything. Emily was my number one and I took a very severe back seat.

No more. 

I count too. I want to feel good about myself. I want to step out of the house and not cringe if I spot someone I know on the street. I want to feel proud of my accomplishments and where I am and how far I've come. I want to be - need to be - a good role model for Emily. I want to stand tall and be proud of Me.

Source: stylemepretty.com via Clare on Pinterest

So this year I will take time for myself. I will pamper myself, do my nails and my hair and similar shallow things that make me feel like I can take on the world. I will enjoy being a woman. I will remember that I count. I will not be made to do things because they benefit other people only. I will not be pushed around or guilted into things. I will accept that some things just aren't meant to be, and I will block out anyone who tries to tell me otherwise. At the same time, I will push myself out of my comfort zone to the extent that I can, I will challenge myself and discover. I will be a peaceful person, at peace with myself and those around me. I will be a better, all-rounded, human being (who enjoys a good bitching session every now and again).

Remind me of all this in April when I am drowning under dirty newborn nappies and begging for sleep and snapping at anyone who so much as glances in my direction. Remind me that as a person with by then three months of rebuilding Me, I can and will get through this.

(PS I have no illusion that I will be prancing around in 6-inch heels but it never hurt anyone to dream.)